I know that anyone that has lost someone close to them will,like me, be haunted by dates. The day they died etc. They are never far from our thoughts of course at most times,but then significant dates come along and it gives a time to see it all from a slightly different angle, albeit none less painful.
It is 3 years today that my sister got a 'death sentence' from the hospital, when she was given the news that far too many receive, 'it's terminal cancer' 'we're sorry,there is nothing we can do'
Even more of a shock as she only went in for a hysterectomy - cancer was never on the cards.
But 7pm on Friday 13th of May in room 13 on this ward will be a scene that will never leave my head.
Even now I find it hard to think that I won't see her again and I can't just call her up for a chat or head out for the day.
We talk about cancer as being a cruel illness, like there are kindly ones out there - well maybe it's not the illness but the way it is treated or not treated that is the cruelty.
The choice, one quickly realises, on just what the NHS will offer, is limited, it is no different than 70 years ago. It is still surgery,radiotherapy and chemo....the drugs may have changed, but then again - even there, not that much.
All those years on, people still dying from it in ever increasing numbers, diagnosed with it in ever increasing numbers and yet still we persist with the same basic approach.
Across the globe innovative methods are showing results, methods that are cheaper in many cases, more effective but ignored.
There are various experts out there with documented studies and strong case study evidence to show how different approaches can work.
We held our own conference a year after my sister died, 2 months later, a similar conference and later next month Back to Health in Exeter, UK, have a fantastic line up of speakers, all sharing the knowledge of what is out there and working to restore to health for those with cancer.
At the moment, those wishing to follow a different route need to have the finances behind them, but how much does it cost to fund that same patient through the set route. What if doctors can explore other methods for patients, what if you had a budget for your treatment, i wonder where you would spend it.
Cancer was an illness I wanted nothing to do with, I didn't want to have to think about it, so how quick a learning curve for me, when I watched my sister being given the news and that look of disbelief on the face of her husband. The coldness and matter of fact of the delivery from the doctor.
My single biggest regret was not having enough knowledge at the time and playing catch up with the limited time we had
Don't let lack of knowledge be a regret......in terms of health and treatment, get informed and keep updated. Some people watch their stocks and shares more than what's going on with their health. There are no pockets in shrouds as they say! They keep a look out for the best interest rates, but not the latest innovations in health. They vote on X-factor but not in an election. Press the MP's to review the outdated 1939 cancer act and untie the hands.
Why do we trust decisions on our health provisions ultimately to MP's a Secretary for Health one minute and Trade and Industry the next.....So we need to press for better provisions and greater choice in heath care and train our doctors far wider than the MERCK manual.
How many people will hear the same words today my sister heard 3 years ago and how many through conventional and blinkered approaches will be dead in 6 weeks.
I will never forget my sister being told she was too ill for chemo, so we had to try diet and supplements and natural medicine, so much so she got stronger and well enough to have chemo offered - her fear lead her to accept it and just one bout lead to her death along with increased so called pain relief.
She regretted the chemo instantly, her instinct over taken by fear, yet there is no going back after a chemo infusion.
Cancer patients rarely have an autopsy of course, after all, who wants to put a body through that they say....I wonder what the real cause of deaths would be if autopsies were carried out?
Get informed and don't act out of fear.
As Philip Day (Health Journalist) writes....Cancer, why are we still dying to know the truth?
